Types of Attraction
The first aspect of forming a social bond is attraction, and there are many different ways in which people are attracted to to those around them. As our book states, there are four different types of attraction, starting with Interpersonal Attraction, relating to the force that draws people together. The three more familiar types are Physical Attraction, the attraction to another person based on their looks, Social Attraction being the attraction to another's personality, and Task Attraction, meaning you are attracted to a person's abilities and dependability. These four aspects are the basic ideas behind how people come to meet.
The Attraction Theory states that Personal Appearance, Proximity, Similarity, and Complementarity are the main forces behind interpersonal attraction.
Personal appearance plays a role in that people tend to have a want to be surrounded by others who are physically attractive, which is believed to come from the idea that attractive people are healthy and are more likely to have healthy children, even if we don't take this into consideration it is said that we do on a subconcious level.
The idea behind proximity is that people tend to make bonds with those who surround them, be that at work or the place they live, mainly just people whom they see on a regular basis. The part I find interesting about this is that the Internet making a big impact on physical proximity. The Internet has made it very easy to keep in touch with people who are both close and far away. I have personally found this to be very true, being a recent high school graduate, I keep in touch with many of my close friends who have moved away to go to college, or my brother who has decided to move five hours away by using the internet and texting. With the use of social networking sites, you can even stay posted with what is going on in people's everyday life, no matter how far away they may be.
Similarity is something that makes a huge impact on me personally. When people can relate to eachother's experiences, backgrounds, interests, etc... it makes them feel more comfortable and familiar, effectively making it easier to strike up conversation and to continue the process of getting to know eachother. It is said that people who are very similar make eachother feel better about themselves. Although I do believe that similarity can go the other way too, for example, my father and my brother have a very strained relationship because of their similarity. My brother is a very reckless, irresponsible kind of person who tends to get on my father's nerves on a daily basis, but my father has a hard time disciplining him because he was very much the same way when he was younger.
Complementarity states that even though people are attracted to similarity, they can also be attracted to people who are different. Although, for this to work, a person as to see the other's difference as a positive thing, as a benefit to themself. For example, I find myself to be very unorganized, whereas my fiance is an organized person. I find this to be a benefit to me because I have somebody to keep me in line, and she sees this to be positive to her because even though I pay all the bills, she is the one that takes care of me.